this way.

this way

i’m tired of being this way

of forcing a smile
that never reaches me,
of pretending positivity
can quiet everything
that refuses to be silent.

i can’t escape the stress,
can’t outrun my own thoughts,
can’t seem to think clearly
or act properly.

and the worst part
is knowing i want to change,
but feeling like
i don’t even know
how to become someone
who can finally breathe.

someone who can blink
without tears falling.